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Authentic Sombrero Sahuayo
why do you torture me so?
you are so wonderful for blocking the suns rays
couldn´t you just leave it at that?

must you carry in your tightly sewn straw weave
a thousand and one possibilities for me to be judged?

maybe i´ll be judged a poser wanna-be mexican
or a tall goofy psuedo rockstar,
a localler than thou mochilero viajero
or a gangly assortment of no-style,
a trying to be cool californian
or a clueless exploitative gringo -
maybe i`d be judged a cool traveller.

i don´t want this hat to mean anything
i don´t even want to be cool.

but as soon as it touches my shiny peachfuzz head
the judgements come rolling into my cabeza
the hat sucks them from somewhere within my own
paranoid image conscious skeleton

it was designed to aid in the harvesting of corn
but atop this two meter walking beanpole
it only harvests unwanted attention

Oh Authentic Mexican Sahuayo Sombrero
you make me wander the streets like a sunday drunk
up one avenue and down the other
rubberbanding closer and farther from the sombreria where i bought you
from your grumpy foster parent shopowner

certainly there are more important things to worry about
or better yet - nothing at all.
please, whether upon my head or my bedpost
let me enjoy the fragrance of this day, and feel the feelings i felt before my fingers discovered your fine mexican contours.

*********

i can barely see, above the high duotone walls
green rounded mountains drawing a curvy line
accross the cloudy sky

rotting tile roofs sit quietly breathing the morning.
the low wet clouds have cleared around the city
more than they have in my head

twenty five day palenque time warp detour
nipping at the heels of my
trying-to-be empty mind

aqui estoy. san cristobal. mexico.
surrounded by more than
internet cafes
amber jewelry shops
plazas de artesania
opportunities to buy buy buy

"compra este, compralo, para mi...compra este"
in the sweetest pleading leading voice

i want to invite her to tea
sit down and tell me about your life
but ours is a business relationship

my clean gringo getup, to her
a day or week´s worth of food for the family
her wrinkled earthen beauty, to me
an idealistic native novelty

maybe if i touched her hand
looked into her eyes
and spoke my heart

you are beautiful
i want you and your family to live, and be happy
i want to know you, and pray for your health
we don`t understand each other

that last taxi that sped by looked like a rally car